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Lineup of Shame

Mug with Santa Claus graphic and text on a white backgroundWoman holding a mug with text against a light brick wall
You Ain't Gettin' Shit Mug Sale priceFrom $20.00
Color
White mug with black interior and handle, featuring a zodiac symbol and text on a white background.Woman holding a mug with text against a light brick wall
Legends Are Born in December Capricorn Mug Sale price$20.00
Color
White mug with black handle featuring humorous text and Santa Claus graphic on a white backgroundWhite mug with black interior and handle, featuring 'Happy Birthday' and 'custom name' text on a white background
I'm Sorry Your December Birthday Is Overshadowed Mug, Personalized Sale price$20.00
Color
White mug with black handle featuring a Christmas tree design of dogs and 'Merry Woofmas' text, with a pink circle indicating next day shipping.White mug with black interior on a wooden board, surrounded by Christmas decorations.
Merry Woofmas Mug Sale price$20.00
Society’s Favorites, Not Ours
Two tumblers with wooden lids and funny text on a light surface with a plant in the background and next day shipping signPerson holding a insulated tumbler with humorous text design.
I Can't Fix Stupid But I Can Arrest It Tumbler, Personalized Sale price$20.00
(5.0)
Two clear tumblers with wooden lids and printed text on a light surface with a plant in the background.Person holding a frosted glass iced coffee cup with a humorous label and straw, blurred background
You Can CC Jesus and I Still Won't Give a Fuck Tumbler, Personalized Sale price$20.00
(5.0)
sarcastic and christmas design tumbler with next day shipping signPerson holding a jar with a humorous Santa Claus design and text.
You Ain’t Gettin’ Shit Tumbler Sale price$20.00
(5.0)
Tumbler with 'He Sees You When You’re Pooping' text, with a plant in the background.Person holding a coffee cup with aHe Sees You When You’re Pooping Santa Hat design and text.
He Sees You When You’re Pooping Tumbler Sale price$20.00
Overrated Glass, Your Problem Now
Gray t-shirt with a frog graphic and tI slept like shit ext on a white backgroundMan wearing a beige t-shirt with a graphic and text on a white background
I Slept Like Shit So Today I Will Be Choosing Violence T-Shirt Sale priceFrom $35.99
Color
Gray t-shirt with black text on a white backgroundMan wearing a beige t-shirt with text on a white background
Life Is A Bitch But Thankfully So Am I T-Shirt Sale priceFrom $35.99
Color
Gray t-shirt with printed Fucktose Intolerant text on a white backgroundMan wearing a beige t-shirt with Fucktose Intolerant, Personalized design on a white background
Fucktose Intolerant T-Shirt, Personalized Sale priceFrom $35.99
Color
Gray t-shirt with humorous text design on a white backgroundMan wearing a beige t-shirt with I'm So Good At Aging I Turned 25 3 Times text on a white background
I'm So Good At Aging I Turned 25 3 Times T-Shirt Sale priceFrom $35.99
Color
Crowd-Pleasing? Never Heard of It

christmas

Hoard

Lineup of shame

Shopping here burns calories… kinda.

Buy now. Procrastinate everything else.

Our Aim: World Domination

The Brain(!) Behind ItCommitments-ish

THE IDEAS

Because kindness is overrated.
Inspired by bad attitudes, chaos, and questionable life choices.

THE GOODS

Printed nonsense you’ll regret not buying later. Passive-aggressive
stuff to do the talking
for you.

THE REALITY

Not magic, just merch. Lower your expectations.
You’ll still hate Mondays but at least with caffeine and sarcasm.